All posts by paneintale

An old guy who has learned some things that work, and wants to offer them. But he hopefully knows that hle is not God but that there is one. He needs to remember that in his experience things almost always are less predictable than he thinks they are. He is almost never sure of his ideas, and has learned to shy way away from those who are. In the end, he smilingly advocates for himself two of his favorite German adages (in English): first stupidity will never become extinct and second, when he presumes to assert the truth, he should always have a fast horse and keep one foot in the stirrup (or the motorized equivalent. The only role left for such a person is that of Elder and as the US assiduously works at having no Elders, it will have to be Do It Yourself..

Das Fressen

Erst kommt das Fressen, dann kommt die Moral.

First comes the feeding, then comes morality. the Three Penny Opera, Berthold Brecht.

A headline in Die Zeit online German newspaper of Februarty 28 reads thus: the war in the Ukraine won’t be finished until Putin is finished.

And the double entendre of mh “finished” was as intentional as the “zum Ende” in German was.)

Why?

We see this as a violation of sovereign rights, a blow at a democracy one continent too close to Putins Prison: Russia. There is the thought that he miscalculated the will of the Ukrainians to stay free. He did. quite manifestly.

Does this look and sound like a worried man?

Russian President Vladimir Putin looks on as he visits the construction site of the National Space Agency on the premises of the Khrunichev State Research and Production Space Centre in Moscow, Russia, Sunday, Feb. 27, 2022. (Sergei Guneyev, Sputnik, Kremlin Pool Photo via AP)

We know he has been planning this for years.

We know he is still KGB first, then President.

We know that we are his strawmen, his less than a russian lying cheating, ruthless exploiting capitalists who are responsible for all the woes that he the Billionaire and Mass Murderer and War Criminal and Mastermind of Crimes against Humanity shoves onto us. And it sticks because we are not holy either.

We know that he has been successful in several wars for which he paid no price at all –memories of Hitler and appeasement.

We know he has threatened the deployment of nuclear weapons if anyone interferes with his plans to take and keep the Ukraine. It is clear: his negotiating position is: give up your liberty and arms.

We wonder whether these sanctions will be enough to stop him from..; doing what?

Broken record: to kill democracy on his borders?

Please.

Look at that face again, the smirk of superiority, the look of the cat who got the mouse.

Vladimir Putin is not an idealogue. Political ideology means nothing to him. What is important to him is control so as to make himself in his own mind and in fact if at all possible larger and more powerful than anyone. He thinks that the time for the tyrant autocrat has come and the time for the dithering democrat has gone.

Nothing we have done so far has persuaded him that he is wrong because he is not at the end yet.

Does he give a tinker’s damn about the fate of the people in Ukraine? Yes: about as much as the last murdering megalomanics army, Hitlers boys, came through and devastated wantonly.. Putin is total pragmatism impregnating strategic acumen. He wants what furthers his cause.]

And once more kids in the bleachers: what does he want? Control, dominate, be larger than and eliminate the empire of lies which has made him so utterly …. rich.

Here is what he wants:

  1. access to the black Sea so that the US Navy is blocked there;
  2. tie up the US so that it cannot concentrate its forces and crush him
  3. grain, grain , grain. Ukraine is grain, my friend, BIG GRAIN. And if he owns that, he is Grain King on Earth, his navy is already out on the high seas diddling around in places where we are in the grain game. Because controlling the grain means owning it on the way out, protecting it on the way to our former trade partners, and sinking the few traders we will have left.

and that will keep him Grain King for ever and ever, and ever…

and that will teach China that it pays to join Vlad the Paymaster to run the global economy, sink Taiwan and go to war against a vastly weakened and impoverished USA


He can kill every living human in Ukraine and get all that while we howl about human rights and crimes against humanity and war crimes.

So is this a nutcase who cannot plan his way out of an open barn door? Hardly. We need to take him more seriously than we have any enemy of ours ever,

because there is no bone of other orientation in his calculating KGB computer-brain;

because he thinks he has a right to do whatever he wants: survival of the fittest;

because he is who Luther describes in A Mighty Fortress…

“…our ancient foe, doth seek to work us woe, His craft and power are great, and armed with cruel hate, On earth is not his equal.

Vlad the Destroyer has the jump on us. Sanctions and scoldings and withholdings and constraints will just get him to pull the trigger faster and it could be gas, chemical, viral, nucler or some historically unprecedented mixture, No weapon ever invented has remained unused. Which unused one will he use? Putting our heads in the sand about his baldfaced aggression won’t stop him. Time has come to remove the velvet gloves and hit back as hard and skilled as we can.

any change demands fully taking three steps

1 awareness of what is really happening and it is not just the subjugation of Ukraine whatever the cost to him and us;

2. acceptance: of the facts of life post Party time in the Putin Era, that in one day he transformed it to the Putin Era. All the media talk just confirms it, scolding or not: different strokes for Putin folks. We must not underestimate this enemy. We did in the 1930s and it almost cost us a world war. We must accept that this man has studies all that and made sure he does not make those mistakes. Ever. Period. We must stop thinking that somehow our degrees of moral superiority will carry the day. First they aren’t that great any more and second that is bass-ackwards thought: FIRST comes the feeding, and then comes the morality. Vlad knows that while at times we seem to get them switched in terms of action.

3, ACT–So what do we do? These ideas seem to have some potentiaol while we build back up, one more nauseating time, for war on all symmetrical and-a-symmetrical fronts:

1 Do not play to his fiddle. Take all risks to keep him reacting.

2, Masquerade and mislead. We did it to Hitler, we can do it to Vlad. Dictators do not double back and ask why did it go wrong? And they know they are never wrong. He has no rearview mirror. Make him turn around a lot and while he is turned, remove one of this tools. Silently. Keep him wondering how we did it. Frustrate him. Make hjim think taht we are more and closer than he had imagined, and shortly our masquerae will become Big Boy Warships.

3 Speak softly and carry the biggest damned stick on earth in very public display keeping it just out of his reach but well within ours.

4. Make sure we own the grain. Sink his Navy if we have to.

5. Make plans for how to handle him throwing nukes at non-Nuke Nato Allies. Keep at work on some today’s equivalent of Britains radar and air defense system in WW2 but with one difference: 0 penetration coming our way and having given him a little nuke demo, assured unilateral total destruction of anything he hides in.

6, File suit in the International Criminal Court for indictments against him and all qualified associated perpetrators, enablers supporters for at least the Crime aainst Humanity of Extermination — of Ukraine or any other ethnic group he has had harmed or have been harmed because he stayed the hand of mercy when de facto acting to keep a people from harm is the sine qua non for civilization.

As Robert Jackson said in Nürnberg, those guilty of such crimes must be puhished to the ful l extent of the law because civilization cannot withstand their repetition. It should be an easy task:

  • Malice aforethought if not in evidence clearly does not need to be proven by the prosecution: it will by the ICC rules be imputed from the actions.
  • And since Nürnberg in international law Crimes Against Humanity are no longer a subset of war crimes, and
  • since Nürnberg Crimes Against Humnity committed in wartime state service for country no longer have that state service as a defense=: perpetrators cannot hide behind orders or their rolesl=.
  • Consistent with that it is also the case that a large net can be case for such crimes because those only acting to further the malicious cause in even small ways are to be held to the same penalty standards as the big wheels.

Make sure it is all widely publicized and that he has a chance even in absentia to offer a defense: keep the moral high ground via due process.

7. watch for his errors: he is far too self satisfied and angry not to make some lollaploozers. Why:? People with his win lose power thiniing nevder ever have all the right facts about strategic impactl It is too costly to tell HRH Mr Right that he not only blew it but also did it naked. It never fails. When they think they are finally in charge and that actually the people whose families he tore apart, whose national pride he trod into the mud that once was their parks and gardens, whose freedoms her ripped from their souls so that his cronies could enrich themelves in any way they wanted, whose sons died in wars of his hate which he started and whose daughters were forced into his brothels and treated like breeding bitches, then speak loudly and use the big stick.

8 Make sure we go off into this having had an unsparing national dialogue of how we fostered him and his evil. No? — Let he who is without sin cast the first stone. To get one step ahead of him and to be open to small shifts in his currents which open big holes for us, we cannot afford our warriors — in other words nowadays all of us –to get consumed with doubt about our honesty and the morality of our causel We CANNOT AFFORD MORAL HESITATION. HE WILL SENSE IT AND USE IT,

9. Every responsible national officer read and do what Richard von Weizsäcker then President of the West German State said in his memorable courageous and very circumspect and complete speech to the Bundestag on May 8 1985, the 4th anniversary of the Allies Ww2 victor- but,not about win/lose at all. Itr was far more important a speedh than a celebration. it was a plea to the soul of the nation abouT How to reconcile guilt for having been part of the disaster of the war ajd Naziism. Copy attached for anyone to taie ad read itt.

10. Do what the Brits did when it looked too too much like they were cornered and could not possibLy win: have a national day of prayer. But instruct everyone that the prayer has to be only for knowledge of Gods will and the power to carry it out. No other way will work as any other request is based ipso facto on the egos decision of what is best (for itself invariably). After all it was the ego violating Gods moral script for the world that brought about this calamity to begin with.

It is the manner of prayer best suited and clearly proven to work to show the downtrodden, confused, hopeless, desperate and broken on the shards of their own shattered pride the way to safe action again. It is the way alcoholics at the jumping off place have learned to let to and let Godl. Ask them. Their contact info is usually right at the top of the A’s in the phone book. They have been using that manner of prayerwith high rates of success ever since the early 1903s and a previous time of despair and defeat. Proof that the other way does not work: German Wehrmacht belts had a buckle on which was embeded: Gott mit Uns, God With Us. You can easily ascertain from the outcome of WW2 for Germany then how well that steel prayer worked.

Do it that recovery program way and only that simple straightforward way! Leave the big stuff. the reestablishment of morality to the guidance of God. The great German poet+statesman+novelist+top level government advisor+lawyer+international celebrity Johann Wolfgang von Goethe put it this way:

I believe that we bear in ourselves a spark of that eternal light that must be gleaming in the ground of all being,
and which our weak senses can only suspect from afar. To make this spark in us into flame
and thus to make real the divine in ourselves,
is our highest duty.

This is not about religion! This is about keeping the light of that divine spark burning in Europe, now, today. We must fight, it is necessary. But Putin can do that too. Only we in this struggle can act as Goethe suggested. Is it not Putin who seeks to kill that spark of the divine: it cannot coexist with him. Do his actions even remotely suggest any concern for The Light? And is that Light not what makes civilization possible: other orientation, unconditional positive regard for the other accepting the duty to act to prevent harm? Has the darkness of a Putin ever created a democratic state and is democracy, the only political philosophy that is learned and thus adult, the only hope for us?

What about the struggling, self sacrificing Ukrainians: who cannot feel that divine spark in their courage, refusal to accept Putin’s dark future, coming from afar back to their land in mortal danger to help each other? Who cannot discern that divine spark, the part of the divine in each person of good will, glowing as they stand for what’s right?

In God we trust: it is said that accepting the duty to love and defend that is the hardest challenge anyone of us will ever face. Whatever Higher Power in which you believe, it is merely a bush league pinch hitter if he-she-they-it does not demand of us that we grow, does not challenge us.

We are being challenged right now. Will we accept that call to grow? Will we open our minds to the path that a Higher Consciousness might show us? Vlad is all ego. When has that won anything lasting for anyone? Is it not time that we began to develop a higher consciousness?

The Brits had National Prayer Days when it appeared that they were finished. You can tell by the outcome of that war against men with God With Us on their belt buckles how well that beltbuckle God worked for them.

If you rail at this, then at least let the rest of us go that way. Judge by the results. And ask yourself: have our unaided minds kept us out of Putin’s grasp?

Let go and let God. That is not religion, it is just common sense.

Believe me, I have friends who live that way and I have seen it clearly. That simple practice is the foundation of a way of life that works in all situations. I;ve watched these cherished friends deal with financial woes, homelessness, fatal diseases, involuntary uprootings, death of loved ones and they, all recovered but not cured alcoholics, managed with a grace and beauty and strength that I just do not see much elsewhere. Lets use the tools that we have: it works if you work it.

Vlad thinks the feeding is the end, that life is all about hoarding. Hitler thought it was all about some mythical notion of strength and, like vlad, the survival of the greediest. In the end, even the cynical Brecht knew it, although most certainly he saw that famous dictum as being about the Fressen. Only as part one: dann kommt die Moral. Vlad does also.

We know what to do, we have turned our armies around in impossibly short times and won before. Our penalties for Vlad’s evil are starting to show their teeth. We are at the beginning of the beginning, but we have Vlad checking behind himself now. It is our one cent’s worth: in God we trust. Live it. Peace. Paneintale

Here is the link to the complete speech by Richard von Weizsäcker,. German Federal President, May 8,1985 to the Bundestag.

https://www.bundespraesident.de/SharedDocs/Downloads/DE/Reden/2015/02/150202-RvW-Rede-8-Mai-1985-englisch.pdf?__blob=publicationFile

Want less but still get the critical points? Here are excerpts:

a two step national recovery program from samuel adams

https://www.inspiringquotes.us/author/5228-samuel-adams

A two step national recovery program based on Samuel Adams.

1  Heed the Wisdom for our Republic from Samuel Adams:

  • “The liberties of our country, the freedom of our civil constitution, are worth defending against all hazards: And it is our duty to defend them against all attacks.” 
  • “If ever a time should come, when vain and aspiring men shall possess the highest seats in Government, our country will stand in need of its experienced patriots to prevent its ruin.”
  • “No people will tamely surrender their Liberties, nor can any be easily subdued, when knowledge is diffused and virtue is preserved. On the Contrary, when People are universally ignorant, and debauched in their Manners, they will sink under their own weight without the Aid of foreign Invaders.” 
  • “It does not take a majority to prevail… but rather an irate, tireless minority, keen on setting brushfires of freedom in the minds of men.”
  • “Let each citizen remember at the moment he is offering his vote…that he is executing one of the most solemn trusts in human society for which he is accountable to God and his country.”

2.  Accept An Invitation from Samuel Adams to his Tories but befitting our Trumpers

  • If you love wealth better than liberty, the tranquility of servitude better than the animating contest of freedom, go home from us in peace. We ask not your counsels or arms. Crouch down and lick the hands which feed you. May your chains set lightly upon you, and may posterity forget that you were our countrymen.” 

bird shot

drab day and woodpecker silhouette about all I couild shoot

I have made the decision to stay away from even possible sources of CoVid transmission on the advice of my good doctor.

He is right. Lifelong respiratory vulnerability is an open invitation for an infection. And being superannuated reduces the strength of the immune fresponse: a second reason to keep away. So I do it.

It is the right thing to do. If I get it, ipso facto I will have exposed others. Maybe even people I know and care for, although most of them are also my age or somewhat younger and staying put at home. But the nobility of it all has faded into….silence filled with the noise of troublesome thoughts and frustrations.

When we lived on the ridge on the side of the mountain in South Asheville, I could deal with cabin fever just by going outside. And if that didn’t work, I could watch Bruno and Zora and then after they died, Kaiser and Titan play.

(First row, third picture: me with Bruno and Zora at the Biltmore Estate. I would exercise them off lead==they were very obedient–and in the cooler weather, I wore a blue baseball cap with a German Shepherd insignia on it, a blue jacket with a Michigan patch on the front, khaki pants, and leather boots. People would gather to see the dogs do their routines and then ask us for directions. They though I was Security…. Second row, first two pictures TItan chasing or hovering, Kaiser leading Titan in chase or lolllygagging on the ground for more play–Titan really never got the lolllygagging.)

People places and things to visit and see — lots in the course of my life’s wandering journey. Lots of gratitude.

Bottom line, however, has been lifelong: antsy, bored, restless? Get out the camera and see what you can shoot and do better than the last time. that has led to Photos libraries of so many digital shots I’m embarrassed to name the number. The point is: taking pictures is, has been and always will be me.

The trouble is, off the mountain, in .8 acres rather than 6, in really unimaginative house a bit less than half the size of the mountain house, (it was all we couid get) is very practical for us and Roxy and Lutz, but quite sleep-inducing .

Rosy and Lutz: are partners but not much for playing together. Still each can havea big day and then they nap together.

Just less to see and do. Life on its terms: accept it and adapt.

OK. Maybe I can get some shots of that woodpecker who hammers away out in the trees around us.

I’ve been trying since April of 2017 — he or she makes a large racket but no image! It got to the place where I was sure, absolutely certain, that he knew I was down there with a camera and bigtime zoom lens. And just to spite me, he would always peck his tree caves on the other side of the tree from me.

Until two weeks ago, that is. It seems his arrogant self confidence got the better of him and he came out, onto the top of a couple trees on the neighbor’s lot, maybe 100 yards from me as the crow flies. And he came out into silhouette, perched on the top of one of those trees and even somewhat with his back to me. As if he were saying, come on, here I am, just see if you can get a good shot of me. I am, after all, very much worth it.

The shot at the top of the page is the result, the sad result. It was (yet another) foggy, soggy, misty greysky day. So my results, even with a good deal of photoshopping in Photos, did not get any better than this:

this was my first clue that I had here the very elusive, large and interesting pileated woodpecker, a male one. Note the red cap — clue #1 one, and the somewhat rectangular holes–clue #2: only the pileated ones make holes that shape. And this one is slim, not plump: a male.

I was happy I got that shot and that it could be improved so much — that one came from an almost black and white silhouette. I had a bit of my passion back, but it is addictive: I wanted something better, more interesting, more colorful, more revealing of this boy’s character.

In the meantime, I began to realize that if I want interesting bird shots from .8 acres and little flexibililty about shooting position, I’d have to find ways to make them come to me. And I have some ideas.

Two weeks later I was taking it easy (from what?) in the am with mly absolutely necessary cup of Aldi Coffee Store, when N out on the front porch called out, “he’s back”. I dashed out in bath robe and iPhone… and jhere he was. It was a clear, dry, blue sky and The Boy was showing off from the top of that same tree. His royal Aves Highness had bestowed his presence upon us once more!

It was a big risk, but I dashed back into the house to get the Canon with the Zoom Lens. To my utter surprise, he was still there, surveying his kingdom from his highwire throne:

Still just at the edge of my lens’ focus ability and a bit less sharp than I’d hoped, but I’ll take it.

When your photo quarry won’t move and it just a ibit too far away and you have very little position flex, then there are only so many pictures I at least can conjure up. So I wound up just watching, feeling a bit dissatisfied that I could not get any other more interesting shots,

And then he took off, hell bent for leather iln the air, headed to his next pecking place.

My lens is a sports lens basically. It is made for action shots and the Canon has a program for that. And I was using it for shots because it is not as persnickety about light as some other settings. So I aimed the camera by dead reckoning, line of sight guesstimate at where I thought he might be as he rocketed out of sight. But I expected not to have caught him at all, the odds were against me.

Oh well.

Later in the morning I was down here on the iMac, downloading the pix from the am into Photos. Boo. Nothing but blue sky and green leaves with lots of shadow.

But wait a minute. In those two shots there, the two before him against the blue sky came out with him as a blur in the heavens–what is that dark shadow? Lets try some adjustments in Photo…

Wow. How grateful for having lucked out and gotten those two shots. They made my day. He is beautiful. And beauty is so utterly consoling. Mr Canon: what a good job! the Gods were with us. Still just a tad indistinct but again, I’ll take it.

Now that’s the sort of bird shot I like. Maybe I have been looking to shoot the birds in all the wrong places. Mr Pileated Woodpecker is telling me that the richness of nature does not end just because my yard is smaller. Keep on doing your ‘tog stuff, Mr G!.

THe lone (Old) plowguy rides again

Brace for the Race

.





 Heavens, how we miss our home. We put our backs and our souls into it — it looking so confidently and, for us, welcomingly down the ridge, oveer the edge and out into the cove far belowl What a treasure it gave us in living the  Blue Ridge mountain life.

HOME -a color shot in winter

Today, we are in a small home that is functional and right sized for us and Roxy and Lutz, our two German Shepherds (#s 6 and p7 since 2001 when Bruno came to us). This house fits our ages, but our hearts ache for the beauty, adventure, peaceful coexistence with nature — of almost 20 years.  It was and will always be home for both of us.

A wonder and also a fright at times was winter on the Ridge. It drew out of us special efforts, at times more courage than we really wanted to summon up, and for me, advengture in service. And that is because winter brought me, The Old Plowguy, outdoors on this:

Me on my Yamaha 660 Grizzly ATV with 5’ steel snow plow blade

For most of my years there, the Grizzly and I plowed the snow off our 1.6 miles of asphalt and gravel. Sometimes I did another stretch of about ½ mile (guess) on a second stretch of rough gravel road.

Plowing uphill just below our drive. Road was 12 feet wide–mostly. Here: most dangerous stretch, called Ski Slope, outside edge hard to find under snow. So you plow from the middle ot.

Over the years, the exhaustion of several hours muscling around 800 pounds of Grizzly and blade wore thin. Sometimes it was admittedlly dangerous. I plowed when the first snow fell at temperatures just above freezing, in order minimize the inevitable re-freeze ice pack forming under the second fall. If you were out and about on that day, you had to be back coming up the mountain by 3 PM. Otherwise, you would be trying to drive on an uphill icerink under slippery snow.

Meanwhile, I would be out there dodging those who thought that they could handle uphill icerinks in rear axle drive cars. Their cars would be found either stuck in the inside ditch, off on a turnout patch, or just abandoned all the way down by the mailboxes. I gave lots of folks an interesting ride going up the icerink on the atv. Griz never needed chains, but my passengers did not know that. I think they found the ride invigorating at least.

I found it tiring. The atv with blade is front heavy and in total weighed about 800 pounds. That means that the atv could easily become dangerous with the blade down, under power that is just a teen big too fast and without that sense for what the snow would permit that only experience could impart . Too much gas, too much speed, not having figured out where to dump the plowed load safely and all of a sudden the atv becomes a pendulum attached to the pinned down blade. That is 600+ lbs swinging across an icy road that is max 12 feet wide. And swinging towards a sheer drop of lots of vertical feet. You could easily wind up down that slope and have the atv come down on top of you.

It was hard work that took skill and experience. I would come home soaked through the underclothes and into the snowmobile suit I wore. And at temperatures sometimes near zero. Then the next day out I would go again to plow it all over again, but this time pushing a good depth of snow off of the thin ice underneath.

Somegtimes the first of the double snowfalls would start at dusk. So, avoiding the accumulation of two snowfalls occasionally meant nighttime plowing with no lights except the two and (later on) an led light bar on the front of the Grizzly.

NIghttine plowing, at the bottom about to plow another lane a mile, all uphill

That was what led me , Griz’s to our nighttime near catastrophic, amazing victory over mountain and weather.

To roll the tape back a bit first: The Grizzly was a wonderful machine. I got it out of self defense and used it with great pride and joy, When we first moved up on that ridge, there were no neighbors at all anywhere near at all. You have to understand: we moved from New Jersey where one neighbor’s house was almost close enough to touch, the other housed a guy who thought it really cool to run the truck engine he was building — right: building — outdoors at 7AM . Two houses away was the fire station, where rhe guys thought is just hunky-dory to sound the alarm at 3 am fire or not. And then there was the collection of unwanted large items. If you wanted to lose something, you just put it on the curb in front of your house and the five finger discount folks came by at night while you were either asleep or distracted by the fire siren and took it. There was no such thing as no neighbors nowhere to be seen or heard where we had lived in Joisey.

It all changed so fast. One day we were sleeping our last night in a Civil War house in Joisey: —one we liked despite all the intrusion of our all too up close and personal neighborhood. Two nights and some hundreds of miles later, we were trying to sleep in our new house up on the ridge at about 3000 feet. No friends, no dogs in the house, no way out in bad weather and lots of hints of Unseen Things in the woods just outside our windows.

OK, so we were no heroes. It was an adventure but also scary at times, occasionally ridiculously so. LIke seeing at night the two red eyes peering into our solarium from outside and not going away no matter what we did. We knew what the dangers in Joisey were, but here, in the woods, at night, there could be Things Unknown. And for nights on end we sat up scared stiff at the two red eyes staring, staring, boring in on use from the woods maybe 15 feet from our bedroom on the main floor..

We finally threw in the towel and moved the bedroom to upstairs. But there they were, thjose two red eyes had followed us and knew where we were higding out. What if now it could get in while we were upstairs asleep? That may have been when I cast off my Northeastern liberal refusal to have weapons in the house and bought a 12 gauge shotgun with buckshot at WalMart. And for what? It turned out that the red eyes were lights from the breaking glass sound detector we had ADT install on moving in. They were reflecting off the inside of the solarium windows which we could see from the main floor or upstairs.

After all, in Joisey, They could be coming to break in. Right? When we told the off duty Sheriff Deputy, who checked on our house after closing but before we moved in, that we had an alarm system installed (No Deutsche Schaeferhund dogs yet at that time), I thought he would have a heart attack laughing. And over time it was very clear: where we were and with the steep, narrow old logging road we had, having al alarm system was as useful an addition as a life saver vest would be for a fish.

There’s a lot more stories where that came from, but I digress – -which by the way I do very well. Back onto the trail here.

Ol’ Griz Saves Ol’ Greg

We moved into our house in December. Not too long after that, In our very first Blue Ridge winter, we had our first Blue Ridge snow and sleet storm. It started later in the afternoon and kept on coming and coming. We could see it filiing up the abojut 450 feet of our drive, from the windows of the library room over the garage.

Now you need to understand: I grew up in Michigan. Snow? So what! Walk miles back and forth to school in blizzards, deliver a Detroit newspaper from a one speed Roadmaster bike in the wintertime dark, in ice storms, in snow storms: the paperboy always delivered. And it was an article of growing manliness that you delivered never dismounting, never missing a porch throwing the rolled up papers. And I shoveled out our home drive and walks. So: I could shovel with the best of them, I had my monster snow thrower which I”d brought from NJ, I had the right gloves and winter clothes. Ice, sleet, freezing rain, fog on ice, snow? No problem, you can take the boy out of Michigan, but you cannot take the Michigan out of the boy. Yep, I know snow, can handle snow.

Except that in MIchigan the boy knew snow that was much more on relatively level land, the boy relied for any help on the neighbors all over the place. I was not used to dealing with snow on ice on slopes so steep that even some pro-plowers would not come up to help us out. And God, being the ever aware instructor that He She They is/are, made sure I got the right tools for mountains, a powerful awd atv with locking differential, and then learned fast how to use it. By the time we moved, I modeestly say with full confidence, I knew it all about atvs on snow. The boy had added to his snow management repertoire..

The library windows over the garage, from which we could watch ice and snow accumulate where we had to drive.
Driveway at the top.
half a mile up, where the road is narrower and rougher, you park down at the end of your drive near my plowed lane, if you wanted to get down and join the traffic you can hear 1000+ feet below.

As I watched the ice-sleet-snow stuff cascade down onto our very long gravel drive, that knot of fear began to tie up my guts. The slush was piling up on the drive and would turn to ice overnight. And I had no way to remove it: my showthrower brought from New Jersey was very heavy, unwieldy on slopes, and would have simply slid down the drive and over the edge just across from the apron of our drive several hundred feet down a sharp incline. And no way could I have shoveled any of it away.

This was apparently God’s first immersion course lesson in mountain life. As a friend once said, if you just can’t live any more with a chainsaw in one hand and your atv keys in the other, it’s time to move off the mountain. I was just learning that you had to do that.

Next morning our drive had 3 inches of ice on it. Three inches of frozen slush,– that much, I’d never seen before. How on earth were we going to be able to get out? Our supplies would soon dwindle away and, Oh my Gawd, WE WILL STARVE UP HERE AND NOBODY WILL KNOW IT !

I wish I could find pictures I am almost certain I had taken. Living up there brought endless and unexpected just great photo ops: that camera had very quickly almost attached itself to me as a new appendage. Which was just fine by me and has bought me wonders of gratitude now.

Long story short, across the cove, which was several thousand yards away from us, mostly nearly straight down from the outside edge of the road at the bottom of our very long gravel drive, Bob B who was building a log house a stretch up the mountain from us. Bob had an atv with a plow. I had heard him buzzing alonmg down on the road. He had established himself as The Lone Plowguy for our scattered, “gently sloping” (real estate-ese for steep inclines) community.

So, holding onto trees and frozen tall vegetation, I’d managed to get down to the road without falling. After waiting for a long time and freezing my you-know-what off, I saw him and hailed him for help. He’d been plowing a bit where the ice was not that thick but his atv would not handle that drive. Someone had in the meanitme hired a guy on a backhoe with a blade to scrape uphill…. After ;more frozen waiting, we got in touch with him when he came up our way and asked for his help plowing me out. He said no. He could not plow that but with the forks on the backhoe bucket,he could rip up the drive to let the chunks then melt over time. So he ripped up the drive surface in to large ice chunks and the pushed them over the side.

No charge. Mountain folks, real mountain folks, help each other –they are a very cooperative clan of highly individual, skilled, economical and just wonderfully friendly folks. All they ask is that you be willing to listen for a half hour after you greet them with Hey Billy, how’r yew? I came to value that immensely.

No charge that is except for paying another guy a lot to come up and regrade the whole drive.

So right then and there I decided, I was going to have an atv at least as powerful as Bobs, and then split up the road for plowing with him. I got the atv all right, — actually more powerful than Bob’s, but Bob would not share plow duty. He wanted the Lone Plowguy role for himself. He moved away however very shortly and that’s how I and the Grizzly became The Lone Plowguy. And came to feel just like he did about sharing the plowing on My Mountain Road.

The big test for the Plowguy and his old pal, Griz, came one evening some years later, in a two stage snow+ice+sleet storm. The weather guys had reported the Lone Plowguys Nightmare: wet semi freezing heavy snow with sleet and some ice coming down in buckets, starting at about 5 pm and going till about 9. And then starting up again in the morning with colder air and snow, a number of inches.

If that froze at night and then got covered in the morning with newfallen snow, we were cooked. Under that white blanket would be an icerink on a narrow, downhill slope. Not even chains would get you down. And we had had our fill of Florida residents who thought, no problem, I’ll just stoke up the Sequoia, hop in with my coffee traveler, and lope on down to the road which I know will be clear. Snow and ice? No problem, we will “adjust” –was how they put it the first time they tried it.

It did not happen twice unless they were unusually stubborn and had had their brains fried by too much sun and too many Pina Coladas,.

I had gotten real tired of getting either a cell call or having some snow covered Floridian knock on my door, after having trudged up the Ski Slope and up our drive, in deep snow, to ask me to stoke up mmy Sequoia or the griz and help him get his Sequoia out of the ditch halfway down thje ski slope. Because they had no idea at all how to shift the Sequoia into all wheel drive that could back that SUV backwards up a greased telephone pole. And ofcourse always blocking the road. Always before I’d had a chance to plow it despite my frantic pleas to wait till I let them know the road was plowed (also because packed tire tracks are hard to plow up without ripping up the road itself).. And always seemingly at some inconvenieent hour.t.

So at 4 PM I began donning the long johns, the insulated undershirt, the snowmobile suit, the cloth inside helmet head cover, the snowmobile gloves, the yellow goggles for evening, and the tall insulated rubberized boots that kept the feet from freezing sitting on the metal runners of Griz. It was a lot of work, and then I trudged out of the house, across the yard in deep snow, and down the flagstone path in deep snow to the unheated shed where Griz awaited –sweating like a dray horse on a hot day even before putting the key into the Grizzlys off and on switch..

You checked Griz all over: were the bolts on the plow tight? the contacts on the electric motor that pivoted the plow snug and still waterproofed? How about the winch rope that attached the 3,000 pound lift weight rated winch to the hundred pound steel 5 foot snow blade? Was the tank full and did I have extra gas, a shovel, some gravel, a rope with clamps, an engineeers hammer and steel spikes, a winch rope repair kit, my coffee traveler, and an extra set of keys? Was the bluetooth headset inside my helmet working to call Nancy if I slid into the ditch? If I slid over the edge, I woild not have to worry to call because 800 pounds of atv wouild tumble onto me as we fell and, well, you can guess the rest.

It always took Griz a long time to start. The shed was not heated and Griz’ oil was often like molasses in January. It seemed that he always decided to start just when I was about to kick him and give up. I think the profanily gave that extra needed spark.

Well all of the above transpired on that fateful evening. I have to admit, I’d never before plowed the whole road in the dark with snow and sleet falling. Nonetheless, I got down our drive and just plowed a lane through the near freezing slush, down the ski slope part of the road down to R’s house, cleared the left hand turn so that it would be less to push coming back up, and , went down that slope to tke hairpin turnaround, and from there, now on asphalt. down the hill — plowing all the way, with occasional turns to the left to push the snowmound I had accumulated in front over the drop off. I once calculated that Griz and I moved of tons of snow in a typical plowing episode.

I pushed loads of wet snow carefully over and down the outside road edge, often very near 90 degree straight down to the cove. Yes, cautiously, to be sure, but also confidently as I had done it all so often before. The lights on the atv to my infinite relief really lit up the road well.

I went down to the mailboxes –turnd around and stopped to take the dusk picture of the single lane you saw abo ve.

And then started pushing the heavy load in short bursts uphill and again off to the side. Griz was lifting, pivoting and lowering that blade like a champ..

At the top of the rise coming up from the mail boxes, on the left, was a friend’s house, He had a very steep and angled drive which was hard to shovel off by hand. He’d also had abdominal surgery and I knew that he would not be able to cleaf that off at all. He and his wife were also German Shepherd dog people — as were we, they also were owned by a couple of those great dogs. So I thought, what the hell, I’ll just take a moment and scrape it off for him.

At the top of his drive, where I’d first gone to get a bit of gravity help to plow down the sides, I raised my blade to back up and there was a loud WHACK noise and the blade slammed down hard onto the asphalt.

At first, belileve it or not, I was embarrassed and hoped that nobody would come out and ask, what’s wrong? I had no idea. The Lone Plowguy is, by definition, always in charge, always prepared, always cool calm and collected. That must have been another Lone Plowguy. The only thoughts in my mind were: what the hell just happened and how can I finesse this in front of my admiring crowds (none of which were out there of course)?

A quick inspection showed that the winch rope had snapped,and backlashed its frayed, wound cold steel lines into a Gordian knot inside the winch housing.. Now why peojple call that wound steel cable a rope I will never know. I sure could not tie it together like rope. I do know that men like that term and that it is especially a favorite of men who pronounce [asphalt’] as “ash-fault”, and with just a little bit of arrogant authority. Anyway, in a panic to see if I could repair it, I found that I had all the repair tools I would need, but none of the right cable clamps. Moreover, my cell was not reaching home from there, so I could not get a ride and leave Griz on trhe road to –do what with tomorrow: the damned blade was down, the cable snarled on he winch, and the socalled wintry mix was coming down harder. And really, was I going to remove my gloves in freezing sleet to try to unwind gnarled steel winch cable (take that ash-fault snobs) inside a still installed winch housing? Was I nuts?

Slowly it dawned on me with a bit of a combined chill and thrill: I would have to drive up 1.6 miles of road, ascending somewhere near 1000 feet, pushing through very weighty and unwieldy semi-frozen snow and ice mounds i’d left along the inside of the road coming down, on ice that had formed under rhe slush, on Griz without his ice chains and with 100lbs of blade locked onto the ground uphill in front of me. I was scared stiff that at some point the pushback from the accumulating onto the pinned down blade would cause me on the Griz to pendulum and slide backwards over the outside edge of the road.

Griz was about to show me his mettle or at best, I’d have a very long walk back home without a flashlight on ice.

I locked the differenrtial, put griz inro gear and shoved the throttle, as WW2 fighter pilots said about going into war speed in emergencies, “balls to the wall.”, (plastic balls atop the two engine throttles all the way to the firewall — sorry alpha males and imaginaative females, but it had no physiological meaning),

All I can say is: wow. Old Griz did not even-grunt in pain.! My boy just dug his rubber claws into the pavement, leaned up into the slope, and wrestled, punched, pushed and slammed the snow all over the place all the way to rhe garage door at home and in record time. After about one minute riding with complete trust in Griz, I just leaned into the incline with him and we had just a unmatchable victory adventure up that dark little narrow old logging road, riding in complete harmonious mutual control.

Man did I love it: the Lone Plowguy Rode Again! It never got better than on that night.

In all this story telling, however, I have missed one part of my life with the Griz: the sense of thrill going up and down the slopes on a bright, cold morning, slopes in such pristine, clean, white blankets of snow. I wished old Griz could ferry me and my cameras but leave no tracks:the newfallen snow is so utterly soothingly beautiful.

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Up to the top

Hail, from the Victors

Well there you are, now a sort of digital Tonto to my equally digital Lone Plowguy. But you know, as I’ve been immersed in writing this, figuring out how to get video into a block but mostly closely examining my pictrures and videos to see where I want them to fit in this narrative, there has been very little thought angst about the maelstrom of maladies swirling around us these days. Mostly I feel–have emotion–and it is the emotion we call gratitude, although I guess there is thought there too. Do I care? No. It is just great relief. Thanks for reading my sharing.

Good or bad, thinking makes it so.

A graduate of the southern Michigan high school I attended recently found a copy of the school’s 1926 yearbook in aThrift Shop in South Carolina. When he told the owner of the shop that he wanted to send it to his and my home town’s Historical Society up there, the owner of the Thrift Shop gave it to him for free.

It contains many hand written thoughts from 1926. The Historical Society published a few of them in the newsletter I get every month. Ofthe ones in the newsletter, three spoke to me — (the Society preserved punctuation, spelling and sentence construction):

“Love is great, love is mighty, I only wish your night shirt

Was next to my nighty. Now don’t get excited or be misled,

I mean on the clothes line and not in the bed.”

“A good thing to remember a better thing to do -is to belong

To the construction gang and not to the wrecking crew.”

“Remember the word “American” ends in I can!”

Those are the sorts of thoughts and they innocently clever style that I heard and learned as describing being an American in my formative years, 1941-1951. They re-awaken and refresh me like a cool wind on a hot, muggy, air-polluted day. They are like pretty flowers growing in an opening you had not seen before in a dark forest.

Nothing in the world is good or bad, but thinking makes it so. (Shakespeare). How might we indeed bring good light into our current,national-cultural bad, narcissistic darkness if we had retained the abilities, values and simple clean morality of that long gone era! Where indeed have all the beautiful flowers of American thinking gone?

Carpe Diem and Memento Mori

I walk with Roxy each day in the local municipal Cemetery.

It started out because anywhere else, our self absorbed fellow citizens walk with their dogs off leash.. And the do it wherever they please. I suspect that many of them really get a kick out of scoffing at the leash laws right in front of all the signs that say, All dogs on leash all the time.

It is tempting to skewer that behavior with the long thorns of acidic sarcasm and wicked wit. Let me just dismiss that path by saying that we are merely seeing another manifestation of the heads in the sand, I’m entitled Unites States of Narcissism. It is our culture now.

i was struck by the quiet in the cemetery. Expecting to be put off by being around dead people, I was surprised. No smell of rot. No hands reaching up out of the grave to grab Roxy and pull her, screaming, back down undergroud. No apparitions being exhaled like thin smoke by the grave. Not a thing from Hollywood at all. Just quiet and grey stones in varying stages of wear stuck at tottering angles, like uneven teeth in an old man’s mouth, On brown grass. Gothic trees reaching with concentration camp limbs silently to something we cannot see, lording their powerful shadowed presences over us lesser mortals.

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Nancy had found this place after having been frightened by dogs off lead while walking Roxy also. She had urged me to go, but I was reluctant. Why?

We had made a memorial to our three beloved German Shepherds Zora, Bruno and Kaiser. All three died in our house on the mountain with us right by their sides. I took to heart what Butch, our deceased Schutzhund trainer had said was his moral commitment to his GSDs: he would make certain that the last thing any one of them saw on this earth was his loving face. Amen. Me too.

We had found a cross shaped piece of wood, the day after Bruno died, on a spot in the woods where he loved to lie. More than coincidence, random chance?  I stained it, found rocks and spray painted them gold, and made a little memorial mound on that spot. I loved to go there, sit on the bench I’d made of cinderblocks and boards, remember them while loving the beauty of the woods and feeling, still achingly sorrowful for their absence, grateful for their lives.

On the last night we were in that house, a really perfect cool clear night on last March 29-30, we took the urns with their ashes, and spread them in our woods memorial chapel.  I read a farewell passage and prayer we had written for the occasion. We did the same at all their favorite outdoor spots.

That was supposed to have tied off the loose ends of grief. It did not. It did not because it was aimed,ever so subtly, at relieving me, at least, of my grieving for them — which I still am doing and most likely will do until the day when I die too. I had not gotten the message.

The cemetery is not colorful, and the plastic flowers or wilted real ones just emphasize by contrast the grey, colorless ness of a whole bunch of old and new graves. It is clear to me that there will always be loose ends, that I could well be one of those headstones one day, and at 76, not too far off.   My memorial spot back up on the mountain– well, it was not an acceptance of life on life’s terms.  And that was a well meant mistake, an act of American pretend.  It was a way to hang on.  You cannot hang onto anything gone from this world, it’s like trying to grab and hold a chunk of The Present.

What’s left? For me what’s left is the realization that this life, which seems so hard and sturdy with its atoms and molecules and thumbs that hurt when hit with my hammer, is just an illusion.  When you cannot stop the show and cannot hold onto the present, how can it be otherwise?  A glorious, beautiful, super ultra high definition movie which we crate as we act out our roles.    A moving feast.  What a theater, what a chance to grow!

So: Memento mori–remember that I too must die.  And I’ve discovered that in doing that, I find much much more of rich joy in that ephemeral elusive thing we call the present.  Heavens, today is a great day to die on!  I now know that native American wisdom to be a statement of gratitude for reality, not a morbid preoccupation with Holllywood’s contorted view of death and dying.

Thank heavens for my cemetery walks.  I have my beloved Roxy with me, sometimes my dear, patient, loving and long suffering Nancy —  and being there above ground provesI’ve got one more day on which to enjoy the abundance of God’s earth. Carpe diem and memento mori.